[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aTXlWYdodnc] What would your personality be like if you hung around the 300 Spartans? For one, it would probably help eradicate every bit of wuss you have lying around inside. The other day I was thinking about how it's just as important to work on your character as it is to work on your outer appearance, and how at the end of the day, your image is useless if there's no personality behind it to communicate. Then the question arose: what are the most EFFECTIVE ways to build an attractive personality? I'm always working on some part of myself that I want to develop. Currently I'm trying to learn how to become a better storyteller. I wasn't making any progress for awhile but quickly realized that I was taking the wrong approach of trying to learn it all on my own. I didn't know what worked and what didn't, and how I could work on these traits more effectively. Through this process I was reminded that many guys are trying to become a better version of themselves, but are struggling to do so because they are spending too much of their energy reinventing the wheel instead of modeling after those who are already on the ride. Something like storytelling isn't something you can improve at by yourself. Alone, the process can be slow and full of mistakes, but by surrounding yourself with some of the best, you cut down the learning time tremendously by picking up on the crucial principles and details that only experiential success can bring. Basically, you'll be set on the path that guarantees results if you stick to it. All you have to do is follow through.
You become the average of those who you're constantly around.Early today, I was eating breakfast and watching this commercial on television that featured a white girl, an Asian girl, and a black girl. I was busy eating my food and wasn't even watching the screen, but just by listening I could clearly make out which girl was which from their accents. The white girl had a slight New York accent that I made out in a split second (which was easy because I'm from New York), and the Asian girl spoke in a subtle, but distinguishable Asian accent, which I could tell from her slight overcompensation in pronouncing her words. The black girl had an attitude in her voice like she was from the ghetto. This has nothing to do with racial background, but more about where these people grew up. The way they talk might have nothing to do with where they are specifically from either, but the people around them. Most of the time these people have NO idea that they have these accents, but they have them because of the people they surround themselves with. The fastest and most effective way to grow a part of your personality is to surround yourself with people who already have what you want. Have you ever caught yourself acting just like the friends you hang around most? Most of this is subconscious. It might be certain vocabulary you use, the tonality in how you say a word, or even your attitude towards life. When we hang around people long enough, we inevitably move towards similar behaviors, beliefs, and ways of living without even thinking about it. Choose who you surround yourself with carefully, because they could be rubbing off on you, in both beneficial or detrimental ways. We can easily become a sponge that absorbs the behaviors of those we stay in contact with most.
The Mastermind GroupCoined by Napolean Hill, a man who studied thousands of the most successful people in the world and distilled the commonalities into the principles in the book, Think and Grow Rich, the "mastermind group" is a must for anyone serious about growth...
A girl once had me attracted through one quick flash of her smile. Her teeth were so clean and beautiful that I felt like kissing her. It’s not even a weird fetish of mine, it was just a natural response to her healthy and gorgeous smile. I understand that part of it was a psychological response that we humans naturally have towards health indicators. We find a person more attractive when they show signs of good health, and become more unattracted when they show indicators of bad health or disease. For example, some attractive signs of health in women are a healthy smile, silky hair, and smooth clear skin. Unattractive signs would be all the opposites such as yellow teeth, frizzy hair, severe acne, dry wrinkly skin etc. It's pretty awesome that even attraction can be broken down to a science. So this girl who attracted me reminded me how important it is to make sure our smiles are something we take care of. Within our everyday interactions and especially with the opposite sex, our smile is a key component of placing the other person at ease and filling them with good emotions. All this article is meant to do is to remind you to check your teeth in the mirror and see if they need a little bit of touching up. No matter how genuine your smile is, nobody finds a row full of yellowish teeth attractive. It gets pretty distracting when you’re talking to somebody and you feel like you're talking to the Joker. On a side note: Heath's engrossing performance in The Dark Knight makes it one of the best movies I've seen in awhile. Go see it if you haven't!
Check Out Your SmileFor starters, make sure that you’re brushing your teeth at least twice a day and flossing before you go to sleep. Most guys have their brushing down, but a lot of guys don't floss. Don't be one of them. If you don't floss, food from yesterday or who knows how far back will stay in your teeth and eventually lead to plaque buildup. Not only will this discolor your teeth, but if not properly taken care of, will cause problems down the road for your gum and teeth. Ask yourself, when is the last time you went to get a checkup with a dentist? If you haven't been to one in the past six months, you should go. The best part is that they'll clean everything up, so if you have any plaque, your dentist will remove it for you in all those hard to reach places. For proper care at home, it's recommended that you brush after every meal if you can. The food and drink that remains in between your teeth is what is staining them. If you're not home and can't brush your teeth, at least rinse your mouth out with water. Every time I go out to eat, I try to go to the bathroom before I leave the restaurant to rinse my mouth out of any food particles. Besides solid food, the other major culprits of tooth discoloration are soft drinks, coffee, tea, wine, and tobacco. For whiter teeth, try to cut down on these products or avoid them. If it has to do with genetics or age you can try to improve your smile with some whitening products, a whitening session at a dentist, or as a last resort, getting them cosmetically improved with veneers.
A Review of the Best Teeth Whitening ProductsOne of the best options is to get your teeth professionally whitened by a dentist, but it can cost you up to hundreds of dollars. It definitely gets you results, but I hear you're told not to eat any kind of colored food for a couple of days, which should have just been the advice before the whitening process. It's not permanent, but it's faster and results are virtually guaranteed. But you can save a lot of money and still get good results with some great over the counter products out there. There are so many teeth whitening products out there that you can use, but which one should you get? Here is a quick overview of some of the top rated whitening products:
The right shirt is the cornerstone of a man's wardrobe. After all, men don't have too much choice with clothing. It's mostly a variation of shirts, pants, jackets, etc. It's confusing enough to work with those basics, imagine what women have to deal with... Today we're going to talk about collared shirts and casual ways to wear them. Sometimes a man wants to avoid collared shirts that make him look he just got out of work, and wear them in ways that give him a laid-back aura. Let's get to it.
Short Sleeve Collared ShirtsSurrounded by tees and tank-tops during the warm weather, you can stand out with a bit more class and elegance by opting for a collared short sleeve instead. A short sleeve shirt naturally brings with it a casual aura that long sleeves (even when the sleeves are rolled up) can't match. At the same time, you keep the classic touch of a dress shirt with the collar.
Variegated StripesVariegated stripes are associated with nights out so they're more appropriate for such. Try wearing this Italian-style pattern underneath a blazer or a sweater. Just be careful about wearing it without a blazer in the clubs, because you may look like a carbon copy of many guys there. I love these shirts because the color patterns can take the place of a tie and still pack the same punch. Without the tie, you look more relaxed and ready for some fun, but the shirt still adds an accent to your outfit. In the case that you do plan on wearing a variegated striped shirt with a tie, go with a solid tie to maintain balance. You don't want pattern on pattern - it'll get too busy.
ChecksA gingham shirt is a great way to bring life to a suit. It's also a great choice to wear on top of jeans for a casual date. Heck, it's a lot more interesting than the pinstriped shirt that every other guy is wearing and certainly more interesting than a blue collared shirt. Roll up the sleeves and you're good to go - all style, no fuss.
How is Your Vocal Projection?All women want a confident man. One of the surest ways to display confidence is by having a strong, clear voice that isn't afraid of being heard. You don’t have to sound like Barry White or Don LaFontaine (the man who does almost all of movie trailer voices today), but if you have a high pitched voice, it wouldn’t hurt to deepen it a bit more (to sound more masculine and strong), but not so much that it’s obvious you’re trying hard. More importantly though, you should talk in a volume that can move easily across a room, and in a clear tone that everyone can understand. You’d be surprised how many guys have a problem with low volume, mumbling, or being monotone. It's really not an area guys pay attention to or make an effort to fix. Next time you’re in a social setting, look for the guys who have poor vocal projection. Pinpoint what it conveys about that person. Think about this: Would you be attracted to a woman who sounded like a man? In the same way, most women are not going to be attracted to a man who sounds like a woman. What impression would you have of woman you just met if she spoke in a weak voice that you could barely hear? Shy? Insecure? It doesn't matter what you say if people can't hear you! Weak voices can give the impression of fear and anxiety, two impressions you don't want to give.
Why Most People Aren't Loud EnoughMost people speak quietly as a result of being brought up that way. We're told from a young age not to be loud or rude, and respect the people around us. This is fine, but it doesn't help with picking up women. Almost anyone can speak louder. It’s nothing but a mental block that people have, not a physical one. You just have to become more comfortable projecting your voice. When I was first working on my voice, I realized that the only thing holding me back was that I cared what other people thought of me. I worried that other people would listen in on my conversations. But I realized I was just being stupid and paranoid because I would never see these people again - why did it matter if they heard me? It was because I was always taught to be mindful of other people, and so I grew up talking in a "considerate volume." Now if I see that people are listening, I know that they're probably enjoying listening to my conversations anyway because they are chock full of entertainment and insight. Sometimes I catch people listening in and at the same time smiling, laughing, or nodding their head. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that you should be running around speaking in a unnecessarily loud volume. The goal is to just have strong voice that the person listening can clearly understand. Do you frequently have people saying, "what?" or asking you to repeat yourself?
(Now that's a great fit!)One of the things we discuss inside the Kinowear Bible is the fact that it is nearly impossible to look great if your clothes don't fit properly. One of the most effective ways to improve your image is by taking a long and hard look at the way all of your clothing fit you, and never wearing anything that doesn't fit correctly. Most guys are walking around in ill-fitting clothing, and I'm writing this article to start an awareness campaign. Awareness of what? The "Bad Fit Disease," or "BFD" for short. This is a disease that we need to fight before it turns into a full-fledged epidemic. I'm ruthless about fit when it comes to my clients, because I know how much a difference it makes in a man's image. A great fit that molds to your body can make inexpensive pieces look like designer pieces, and take you from looking like a slob to the well-groomed man. Here is a quick look at some bad fit victims followed by pictures of the cured...