fashion-meme-dont-understand

Why Most Guys Will Never Understand Style

Not all knowledge is created equal.

Most people think they can simply read a blog post and understand style. They think they can read some magazines and understand style.

Heck, a lot of people purchase the Kinowear Bible, thinking they’ll understand style.

Ehhhh. WRONG.

As the person selling the course, you probably think I’m insane for telling you that the very same thing I sell is NOT going to help you understand how to dress better.

Maybe I am.

But my responsibility as the owner of this business goes well beyond “selling stuff”. It’s to make you a better person. Especially when it comes to upgrading your style.

Sometimes, the best way to do that is with a little tough love.

So let me explain why most guys, EVEN my own customers, will never truly “get” style.

The Two Levels Of Knowledge

Knowledge can be split into two levels: 1st hand or 2nd hand.

The difference between a 1st hand knowledge and 2nd determines the level of weight that piece of knowledge has in your life. The degree to which something holds weight is important as it will directly affect your belief about something.

Your belief is determined by the evidence that holds the strongest weight.

To explain this further, let me break it up so you can see a clear difference between the two levels of knowledge.

2nd Hand Knowledge

2nd hand knowledge is the act of acquiring new information about a given subject. For example let’s say someone tells you that a badass outfit is as simple as throwing on some dark, raw denim jeans with a pair of wingtips, a great collared shirt and a fresh blazer. In your mind you figure it’s “probably” true. You might be able to visualize it. But you will not internalize it.

This is what MOST guys do. They take this first step by doing things like reading blogs, books, magazines, etc. but never actually thinking about the process once they begin to put those ideas into action.

1st Hand Knowledge

An example of 1st hand knowledge is something you experience in your life. For example, say you heard that if you mix ethanol with the extracts of coca cola and X ingredient contained in certain types of household products, you can create a fire that lasts forever. Now, if you read this somewhere this would be 2nd hand knowledge. You may believe it or not, but if you have actually went out, obtained the ingredients, and tried it yourself, you will really know and believe whether it works or not (regardless of what others say). Your 1st hand knowledge will always hold greater weight.

Here’s another example.

Guy A receives two dog bites at an early age. Let’s say both happen before the age of 5.

Guy B watches 10 movies of dogs biting people. Still before the age of 5.

(Side note: Guy B probably also has terrible parents)

Question: Which of these two do you think will be afraid of dogs?

See the difference?

Personal experience is the key.

This explains why a lot of guys out there who read some of the greatest dating advice out there can’t seem to muster up the courage to talk to women. This is because they probably have a 1st hand experience that is sabotaging or contradicting whatever this 2nd hand education is saying.

This also explains why so many men who get into self-help, reading hundreds of books, attending countless seminars, and apparently having “all the answers” are unable to fix their lives and become the millionaires they so “believe” they can become. They usually have some 1st hand experiences that hold them back and neutralize all the surface level, empowering knowledge that they’ve “learned.”

Stop Being A Dreamer… Start Being A Doer

take-action-with-fashion

Many people believe that simply knowing some things that “make sense” will change their life.

This is ridiculous.

You will always live by your foundational reality, which is built up primarily of 1st hand reference experiences. If you don’t have 1st hand experience, your mind will move on to the next best thing.

You may have all the answers, know all the best “techniques” at success in life, but in order to truly succeed is to believe. All belief is rooted in the order of 1st hand experience > 2nd hand knowledge.

This is why my customers who actually LIVE the principles taught in the Kinowear Bible get the best results.

They don’t just read it and move on.

They read a section, think about it, then apply that knowledge to their life by going out and actually buying new clothes.

However, not everyone has the budget to do that. And that’s totally fine!

I get a lot of guys saying they don’t have the money to go out and buy a whole new wardrobe right from the start.

Here’s How To Gain 1st Hand Experience Without Wasting Your Budget

We’ve already covered that if you want to get a deep, core, internalized understanding of style, you have to LIVE it.

Here’s the thing though.

If you don’t have the budget to buy a whole new wardrobe, you don’t have to.

Here are a few ways to gain 1st hand experience and gain access to a whole new level of comprehensive, without spending a ton of money.

  1. Spend Time With Your Clothes – In the beginning, it’s going to take you longer to get dressed. Don’t fight it. Each time you dress yourself you should be thinking about WHY you’re doing it. By spending a few extra minutes in the beginning to internalize your reasons why, it’s going to help it become automatic and much faster as you progress.
  2. Go Fake Shopping – Shopping offline, at first, is much better. You’ll gain a much more deep sense of what GOOD fabric feels like if you can physically touch it. You’ll understand what fits you better if you can actually see it on you. You’ll understand what outfits go well together if you shop online. Once you can a true understanding, you can begin to shop online.
  3. Get Feedback – Sometimes the best experience comes from outside yourself. In my life, I’ve always made the biggest jumps in progress (in every area of my life) when I had other people look at my question or problem from their own unique perspective. You might think you look like an idiot in a certain outfit, but you might look stunning. The difference is your own mind trying to resist the change. I learned this lesson of accepting and looking for feedback in my college days, and it’s given me so many advantages in life it’s unbelievable.

Always Look For The Deeper Lesson

Start today to begin forcing yourself to gain 1st hand experience. I’m telling you, it’s going to change your life.

Not just with style, but every aspect. It will help you become a better man.  Challenging and pushing yourself to constantly strive for new and better heights will transform every aspect of yourself.

When it comes to style, you can choose the avenue that works for you.

If you want to use the Kinowear Bible as your basis, great! I applaud you for being an action taker.

If you want to stick with free stuff, that’s great too as long as you’re willing to put in the extra work to tie together all the pieces, and spend longer doing so.

Whatever you choose, make sure you’re always looking for the deeper connections. You do that through 1st hand experience. Not just lazily skimming blog articles for hours on end, hoping the lessons are going to magically sink into your brain.

Here’s A Fun Way To Get Started Right Now

I want you to think about the next outfit you’re going to wear.

Maybe even go try a few on, and let me know in the comments what you plan on wearing to your next event. Give it some thought. Try on a few different things.

Then, leave a comment below and let me know what YOU will be wearing the next time you’re leaving to hit up the town!

  • I’ll start it off.

    Tonight my wife and I are getting a babysitter and having a date night. Nothing fancy whatsoever, just a few drinks at a local “hole in the wall” bar which has AMAZING food and a fun atmosphere.

    Therefore, I won’t be dressing up with a suit, or even a blazer.

    Instead I’ll be wearing a great pair of jeans with a fitted, dark grey collared shirt, untucked with rolled up sleeves. I’ll pair this with a pair of brown shoes (not sure which ones yet).

    Very simple and casual. The reason? I’ll still be one step above most guys there, but not overdressed and awkward. I’ll probably test tucking it in with a nice brown belt, but I have a feeling it’ll be overkill for the place we’re going.

    Always remember to match your level of dress with the crowd you’ll be around, putting yourself just 1, maybe 2 notches above everyone else. Not 6. You want to stand out without being awkward.

  • Charles Allen

    Love your blog. Even though I’m an old guy…73…I still like to look my best and I love good looking clothes. Thanks for fresh ideas!

  • That’s great to hear Charles! Thanks for reading 😉

  • Billy

    I’ve got a BBQ coming up soon. As you can imagine it will be a casual environment. I still like to look nice though. It doesn’t take much to be the best dressed guy at a BBQ. I plan on going with canvas sneakers, nice shorts, a lightweight button-down with the sleeves rolled up, and a good watch and sunglasses.

  • Loved the blog post, and agree that 1st hand experience is much more effective in shaping an understanding of style.
    I’m thinking of keeping it simple for the next night out at the local, a white polo t-shirt, indigo denim jeans, brown shoes (with a slight broguing).
    What I am slightly confused about is whether to tuck it in or not 🙁

  • Nice man! I’m a big fan of dark grey chino shorts with a crisp white button-down.

  • I think tucking in is based more on the situation. Tucking it in adds a more formal look of course. Last night I decided to tuck mine in because I realize my shirt was just a bit too long to leave out, and my wife wore a great dress so I was matching her level.

  • Hey everyone,

    We’re having some commenting issues. I’m upgrading the comments to Disqus so they’re easier to read and you can see my personal reply better. You’ll even be able to add pictures if you want, follow the thread, share it, etc.

    Please know that your comments are still coming in – they just might not show for a day or so 🙂

  • Nice man! I’m a big fan of dark grey chino shorts with a crisp white button-down.

  • That’s great to hear Charles! Thanks for reading 😉

  • Thanks Yashas!

    Tucking helps add a little formality to it. Last night I decided to tuck it for two reasons.

    1) The shirt was a little longer than I was thinking, so looked just a tad long untucked.

    2) My wife dressed up more than I thought she was going to, with a great black dress. I had to match 😉

  • Yashas

    The place I am going to is perhaps semi formal, so I might just follow suit and tuck it in along with a brown belt to match the shoes 🙂

  • That’s what I would do! If in doubt, you’re better off being slightly overdressed than underdressed.

  • JP Sheehan

    You know what I would to wear when fall comes knockin’?

    A turtleneck underneath a sport coat. It always looks so classy. I mean, if it’s good enough for a villain in a spy movie, it should be good enough for me!

  • Love the post. Definitely agree with your points that first hand experience will always be the best

  • Ha, this comment reminds me of the “Why Brits drive Jaguars” commercial 😉

    Totally agree though! Turtlenecks are probably one of the most underutilized assets in guys closet.

  • Thanks Ronald!

  • 2015 Scarlet

    Great article as always! I for one is a firm believer of 1st hand experience, as lessons learned personally sticks the most.

    What I’m wearing right now is a red/black/white gingham short-sleeved shirt with cream chinos and brand-new brown nubuck desert boots I got from Target for only $25! And that’s Canadian dollars, mind you.

    What i’ll wear tomorrow will probably depends on the weather. Right now it snowed after 2 weeks of warmish weather (+5 up to +12degC) about 10cm. Either way, a dark slim-fit jeans, white sneakers and gray chambray shirt because i’m just gonna be mall-strolling with the kid and wife.

    What i’ll wear at night, if we’re gonna go to a friend’s place for supper, would be pretty much the same, except i’d swap the white sneaks for my brown double monks.